


Special Delivery

by GintaxAlvissforever



Series: Fictober 2020 [2]
Category: Disgaea (Games), Disgaea: Hour of Darkness, Super Smash Brothers, 光神話 | Kid Icarus (Video Games)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Established Relationship, I can't believe Minecraft Steve is in Smash, Laharl is petty, M/M, Running Gag, Sexual Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-02
Updated: 2020-10-02
Packaged: 2021-03-08 05:14:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,223
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26770084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GintaxAlvissforever/pseuds/GintaxAlvissforever
Summary: "A delivery for Captain Pit of the 1st Division! You ordered a box of horse wieners!"It was then did Pit realize how finding ways to deny Laharl in Smash will get him into situations like this.
Relationships: Pit (Kid Icarus)/Rahāru | Laharl
Series: Fictober 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1947220
Comments: 3
Kudos: 6





	Special Delivery

**Author's Note:**

> For October 2020 Writing Prompt with the word being "horse". You have Minecraft Steve confirmed in Smash thus denying Laharl again another chance in Smash Brothers and the very old horse weiner incident in the first game of Disgaea. I think Laharl taking out his anger is justified.

There were times when Pit needed to stop digging his hole deeper. He often got in trouble because of his cockiness and it will always have long lasting effects in some shape or form. As the captain of Palutena's royal bodyguards, Pit needed to set an example as a mature, responsible person. He was everything but that. When he was in Smash, he got to be himself. Sure, people assumed he was a young, innocent angel but he was far from it.

One inevitable future was forced onto him by his Goddess. Pit had at least 500 years to have the time of his life before he was forced to commit to a relationship. Palutena was not his biological mother but she still managed to set him up for an arranged marriage approved by one of the most powerful kings of the Netherworld at the time. Pit and the Demon King's heir would eventually marry to bring heaven and hell together. The problem was that Pit's fiancé was far too young for him and argued about the age consistently. It wasn't right for them to decide a future for them. Unless Pit found a way to nullify the marriage, he was stuck with a demonic prince. Pit had learned that he would rather die than be stuck in a relationship with a demon.

So Smash was the best place for the light angel to make friends, find some romantic partners and enjoy his freedom until that brat hit 1800 in demon years. The problem was said brat always wanted to be the star player. If Pit was in Smash, he was going to get in Smash nevermind how different their worlds were.

Pit laughed at the idea originally. The young prince attempted to join from a ballot suggestion but Bayonetta had been selected instead due to some obvious rigging. (Pit will never forgive Shulk for letting an Angel Hunter into Smash). When that failed, he simply waited it out for the next tournament. When that didn't work he demanded that Pit pull some strings behind the scenes. The brunette wanted nothing to do with his fiancé until he was an adult, so Pit did all he could to lower the prince's chances instead.

Today was just another one of those days where Pit and the other Smashers questioned Master Hand's train of thought. Of all the people he decided to let into Smash, he left Minecraft Steve in.

The story was so stupid! Sonic and Mario were fighting outside of the mansion. Sonic punched Mario so hard that Mario had vanished for a bit. Mario was then punched back into the Smash Realm thanks to a blocky figure with a hoe. Master Hand pointed toward that creepy block and said "He is in Smash."

Now, there were four more spots left in the Fighter Pass that Master Hand gave out to potential newcomers. Laharl was in no ways ever going to get one. Pit predicted that a new Pokémon trainer will show up with a new Pokémon by their side as one of them leaving the other three up in the air. There were too many possibilities on who Master Hand would pick, but as long as a certain bratty Overlord was not on the list, Pit was in the clear.

So Pit thought he was in the clear, but the Netherworld had ways of receiving the news. A few days after the announcement (and Master Hand negotiating with this mysterious figure known as Minecraft Steve), Pit decided to relax. The Overlord had been rather passive with the announcement. Every time he wasn't announced, he stormed out of the Netherworld to complain. He threatened to kill him, throw a meteor to burn down the entire mansion and other childish threats unless he made it into Smash. The newcomers were always confused why a child with bug antennas hair kept showing up. Other potential fighters who were highly requested weren't as persistent as the young demon.

 _Maybe Laharl finally realized he's not getting in._ Pit thought to himself happily. _Maybe now we can actually have a normal conversation that doesn't involve Smash._

Unfortunately, it was too good to be true. The angel captain decided he would nag Rob again today. It didn't matter if the tactician was with his boyfriend. Pit enjoyed annoying Shulk. He wasn't alone. One of the new fighters was trailing them too for different reasons entirely. Pit reminded himself that Joker was important in their plans concerning the Great Evil, but keeping him up to date was such a hassle.

The trio were lurking around the front door when the doorbell rang. Pit assumed someone ordered pizza. There was no harm in going to the front door and answering it. He was surprised to see a normal demon fighter with a box addressed to the angel captain. While he enjoyed presents, Pit knew this was a bad omen.

"A delivery for Captain Pit of the 1st Division! You ordered a box of horse wieners!"

It was then did Pit realize how Laharl made sure he would suffer. The delivery demon didn't understand why the angel before him was threatening to punch him in the face. There were some Smashers behind Pit that heard the delivery man. Most of the fighters at this point knew that Pit had a fiance that he didn't want to introduce to them. Newcomers were in the dark about said fiance unless they were there on the first day of the new tournament.

Shulk folded his arms and sighed. He had a feeling this would happen even without a vision. Pit was just so predictable and Laharl even more so. Rob chuckled. He was supportive of his friend being with Laharl once he was an adult and encouraged him to spend time with him. This came off as a practical joke.

Akira on the other hand was a newcomer who didn't understand the implication and was overall confused.

"Why do I have a feeling I'm locked out of this conversation?" the Phantom Thief asked in an annoyed tone.

"Oh, it's a gift from his fiancé," Rob hummed. "Laharl is rather...vocal about his feelings."

"...Horse wieners?"

Pit grabbed the box before throwing it at the delivery man. Rob burst out laughing at the angel losing his temper.

"Send this back to the Netherworld and tell that little brat that nothing he does is going to get me help him get into Smash! These wieners are outdated!"

"W-What?! B-But the prince said you love wieners."

"If you don't leave now, I will shoot you."

The poor delivery demon didn't understand what went wrong with the job. Once the demon scurried away (without taking the box mind you), Pit slammed the door hoping that Laharl wouldn't suddenly pop out of a demon portal.

"Stop laughing," Pit hissed. "I hate that kid sometimes."

"I think he's just showing how much he cares," Rob teased. "You think so too Shulk?"

"Yeah...affection…" Shulk mumbled.

Akira glared at Pit. The angel wanted to go to the kitchen and grab a carton of ice cream, but the Phantom Thief was going to let him do that.

"So...you had a fiancé. When were you going to tell me this?"

Now, Pit had to explain the whole situation with another Smasher yet again.

**Author's Note:**

> Notes!
> 
> 1\. I was sleeping when Minecraft Steve was announced. I have no attachment to the character but only made a mental note that Claude now owns the Minecraft server in the Smash Brothers Mansion like he does in Garreg Mach.
> 
> 2\. Laharl got no chance in Smash LOL I know I said that with Banjo all the way back in Smash 4 (and he ended up in but everyone dropped him in a week because no one cared enough). Too many characters to pick from and Laharl is at the very bottom no matter how unique he can be. So Laharl is now in the bargaining phase at this point with how many times Pit has mocked him for it.


End file.
